Monday, January 30, 2012

Red Dwarf Food: Drunken Fry-Up

Drunken Fry Up ...aka "The Full Monty"
Best between Midnight and 4:00 AM.

To qualify a meal as a Drunken Fry Up, two criteria must be met:
1. You must be drunk when you prepare it.
2. It must be some variant on the traditional English or Irish breakfast.

Red Dwarf makes references to the Drunken Fry Up here and there in episodes like Stasis Leak, Emohawk, and Thanks for the Memory. In keeping with the Lister Tradition, our weekend visits to Gwen's Old Family Canal Haus usually involve at least one evening with massive amounts of alcohol and a midnight fry up for 5 or 10 drunken geeks. It's amazing how much better baked beans taste in the middle of the night.

Suggested Ingredients:
Black Sausage, White Sausage, Back Bacon, Smoked Bacon, Bangers, Sausage, Kippers, Oysters, Baked Beans, Eggs, Oatcakes, Toast, Mushrooms, Tomatoes, Mashed or Fried Potatoes

Prep all of your ingredients ahead of time and set them by the stove. This is extra important if you're drunk enough to be dangerous with a knife: prep THEN drink.

Don't forget this Very Important Step

For the Oysters, use a standard cornmeal crust: dust in flour, dip in egg, roll in cornmeal or crushed saltine crackers. Pan fry them over medium heat in a little bacon grease (sub oil mixed with butter) until the crust is golden brown.

Another Very Important Step

Get the beans going over medium-low heat near the back of the stove; they'll take care of themselves. The kippers can be served at room temp straight from the can.

This might be a good time to get a helper

Heat a VERY LARGE frying pan (or all the frying pans)(I think). Start with the meats, especially the bacon. Use the bacon grease to fry up the eggs, mushrooms, oysters and tomatoes. This is an excellent time to find out what else tastes good cooked in bacon grease.

Time to try beer with bacon grease?

Pile the food on a plate. The percentage of food that actually makes it onto the plate is inversely proportional to the amount of alcohol you've had.


  1. I would add a Rule 3: You must be drunk when you eat it.

    That's sort of implied by the whole article anyway, but I felt it worth making explicit.

  2. Either drunk or hungover when you eat it :) Both are equally recommended.

  3. I want fried kimchi with this. And then I want everything in this recipe to be stacked in a breadbowl with chili sauce and chutney and then I want to eat it like a modified tripple fried egg chili chutney sanwhich as big as my head. Or or or we could fry everything but the eggs, put it in the breadbowl, pour the eggs (beaten with the chili sauce and chutney) over, bake it, and eat slices of it like pie. It;s be like quiche but 95% meat products and 2% potato, 2% bread, and 1% eggs. And frieddried anchivies with chili sauce smf then we'll chace it with enough gin to kill s small rodent. now that's lovrr